Hello Reader,

Happy early Thanksgiving! This is one of my favorite times of year! 🦃 🎄

Yes, I know that’s cliché – but, as I like to say, cliches exist for a reason!

One thing I’m grateful for this year is knowing other people who have very different opinions and perspectives than I do. Yes, that includes different political beliefs! 🇺🇸

How boring would life be if everyone thought just like I did?! 😴

But having constructive conversations with those who don’t share my beliefs can be, well, DIFFICULT.

But here’s the thing – whether that difficult conversation is with a client, an employee, a significant other or an acquaintance – skillfully navigating difficult conversations can make our lives meaningfully better.

📚 Difficult Conversations: Harvard Law School’s Program on Negotiation

Back when I was completing my MBA – which is longer ago than I can comprehend 🤯 – I was introduced to a book titled Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most.​

🤩 It is an EXCELLENT book based on decades of research performed by Harvard Law School’s Program on Negotiation.

I can wholeheartedly recommend it to everyone – because we all need to be having more difficult conversations!

Difficult Conversations walks you through a step-by-step approach for how to have your toughest conversations with less stress and more success.

PDF Cheatsheet to Difficult Conversations 🗣️

I was so excited about this book while in business school that I did a whole presentation on it!

📄 As part of that presentation, I made a handy two page cheat sheet summarizing the key teachings of the book.​

This cheat sheet is no substitute for the book, of course. And actually, I think reading my summary will motivate you to read the whole book!

🪩 Here are a couple of my favorite nuggets of wisdom:

• Adopt a “listen and learn” stance, not a “message delivery” stance
• Disentangle the (negative) impact (on you) from the other person’s intention.
• Start by expressing what matters most to you – be as explicit as possible
• Describe your emotions – don’t be emotional
• “The key is to express your feelings [and your side of the story] in a way which invites and encourages the recipient to consider new ways of behavior, rather than suggesting they’re a schmuck and it’s too bad there’s nothing they can do about it.” 🤣

Have a Great Thanksgiving! 🍂

Whatever you’re up to this holiday week, I hope you enjoy yourself.

And don’t shy away from some of those difficult and uncomfortable conversations!

Best,
Dave